Jesus loves a good kit kat every now and again
thers not even any kit kats in that vending machine
if he can turn water into wine im sure snickers into kit kats is just as easy
if I had a twin I would go into crowds of strangers and profess my love to someone and then say “if our love isn’t meant to be, I will go back in time and slap myself” and then my twin would burst in and slap me
"this baby came out of you but im not 100% sure its yours"
back when i was in community college my teacher told us the story of a girl in his class who wanted to have sex with her boyfriend but they didnt have any lube so they used mayonnaise. fast forward a couple of days and she’s getting random orgasms during class and driving places so she goes to the doctor and they check her out and guess what they found
okay ill tell you it was maggots. maggots were in her vagina giving her orgasms.
I CAN TBREATHE WTF IS THIS I JUST FOUND IT ON MY COMPUTER I DONT EVER REMEMBER MAKING It OMG
i like that we say “oh, man” to express disappointment
because men are disappointing
all right here’s the best picture-nominated video I made
I can get this ridiculous thing screened at an actual hollywood film festival if it keeps getting views so please watch this thing
someone mentioned april fools today, and it reminded me that last year a couple of radio DJs got taken off the air and almost faced felony charges because they told their audience that the local water supply was contaminated with “Dihydrogen Monoxide” and alot of people panicked
Dihydrogen - (two hydrogen)
Monoxide - (one oxygen)
some guys almost got arrested for telling people there was water in their taps.